Welcome to March! Although, the weather in Southern California is usually nice, I am feeling the shifts of the coming spring and I cannot wait. The changing seasons always feel like a good time to reflect and welcome a new time in our lives.
I am imagining flowers blooming, colorful dresses and spending time outdoors. Doesn’t that sound nice?
Surprisingly, today I am going to share about a feeling that is quite the opposite of spring time flowers. The feeling of facing your fears! What comes to mind for me when I think of my fears are feelings of awkwardness, failure, insecurities, discomfort and the urge to cry when stepping outside of my comfort zone. Sound familiar?
“Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear” George Addair
We all have fears. And for many of us these fears stop us from moving forward in our lives. We can be afraid of pretty much anything. Starting a new career, ending a relationship, having an important conversation, moving, losing money, being seen, you name it.
Recently, I faced one of my biggest fears – public speaking and I learned so much about fear in the process. Last summer I had the opportunity to give a speech at a women’s retreat. I was excited and ready but once I finally got up on stage, I froze. I couldn’t hear anything except for my fear and emotions raging on about how bad it felt. And in that moment I realized that though I was up there and doing it – my fear was totally running the show.
I decided that sharing my message and inspiring others was more important to me than this fear and I wanted to face it and learn from it!
And when I read this quote by Beyoncé things started making sense. She said, “What does fear taste like…success. I have accomplished nothing without a little taste of fear in my mouth.” I was surprised, Queen B experiences fear too!
That means that you don’t have to be fearless to accomplish big things and that fear was actually an important piece in feeling successful.
I am proud to share that last few months I intentionally created more opportunities to lead workshops and give speeches. And it was scary but I did it and I did it well alongside with my fears.
In other words, I didn’t eradicate my fears and then do it. I joined forces with my fears, I allowed them to come along for the ride – but NOT run the show.
The truth is we are usually afraid of the things that are most important for us to do which means that our greatest fears are not markers for where to stop but are actually signs telling us to keep going. There is a lesson your fears are trying to teach you.
Here are a few lessons that can support you in facing your fears:
- Make Friends With Your Fear
Fear doesn’t have to be your opponent. Have a conversation with fear and tell it that it can come along for the ride but it can’t be in the driver’s seat.
- Feel The Fear & Do It Anyway
Challenges lead to growth, learning and more confidence. The Nike slogan “Just Do It” can be useful in the right circumstance. Fear doesn’t have to stop you unless you chose to allow it too.
- See Fear as Your Teacher
It’s not the enemy that strikes you down and keeps you small. It’s the reminder that you’re leaving the comfort zone and that’s where real change happens! If your feel it- you are on the right track.
I hope this supports you in taking steps toward your fears. For me, the realization that fear is a normal human emotion that even the most successful people have experienced helped me in accepting my own fears and allowing them to come along without stopping me from living my dreams.
In the comments below I’d love to hear from you.
Love and Light,